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Sacred Sexuality
Miracles Happen When Sexuality Becomes Sacred

"Sexuality can be a vehicle into spirituality rather than an obstacle to it." 
 Peter Rengel from his excellent essay on sacred sexuality

Sacred Sexuality
Image by Carol Schoenleber

Dear friends,

This inspiring essay below on sacred sexuality is taken from lesson 19 of the awesome Insight Course. Read and explore the heart and mind opening ideas, essays, and resources here and open to the miracles that can happen when sexuality is combined with spirituality. I have no doubt that when the sexual wound in our world is healed, all of us will experience major transformation. Enjoy the exploration!

With heartfelt love and best wishes for opening to sacred sexuality,
Fred Burks for the inspiring and educational PEERS websites

Sacred Sexuality

Have you ever heard of sacred sexuality? We may be taught little about money in our world, yet we are given even less healthy information about how to deal with sexuality in a sexually obsessed culture. For many people, sex is even more seductive than money. Our media, advertising, and entertainment industries are filled with subtle and not-so-subtle messages about sex. The underlying thrust is all about beauty, sexual desire, and how important it is to buy the products or operations which will make us popular, more attractive, and better lovers.

And even though advertising and entertainment are filled with sexual innuendo, it is rare that you will find anything other than tabloids and women's magazines talking openly about both the joys and challenges of sex. In many communities, homes, and workplaces, serious discussion of sexuality continues to be a taboo subject.

It is also extremely rare that any of society's many sexual messages even hints at sacred sexuality or the spiritual dimensions of sex. To those who have succumbed to all of these subliminal and overt messages, sacred sexuality might even seem like a contradiction in terms. Considering all of this, how can we transform sexual energy in our lives and in our world to better support the good of all of us?

Almost the opposite of societal conditioning, many of the world's religions imprint negative beliefs of sexuality in their followers. For thousands of years, these religions have considered sex to be a base and vulgar act.

Sexuality gets little mention in the sacred texts of Judaism, Islam, and Christianity. When it is mentioned, the suggestion is often to avoid it if possible in order to reach greater spiritual heights. Many monks and gurus also teach that we must refrain from sex in order to reach enlightenment. Yet none of us would be here without sex. There is virtually no spiritual instruction in how to deal with sexual urges other than to abstain. As a result, many people experience a split between sexuality and spirituality in their lives.

For a powerful, yet deeply personal exploration of the sexual-spiritual split by a wonderful workshop facilitator who was willing to explore his own wounds with workshop participants, please read the engaging six-page story below.

The exciting news is that, as shown in the above essay, old paradigm beliefs and attitudes around sexuality are clearly changing. Homosexuality, bisexuality, and other sexual persuasions are gradually gaining more acceptance and support, even in the media. Yet common misperceptions around all forms of sexuality continue to exist in many people and places, and very few have even considered the possibility that sexuality can be used to enhance spiritual growth.

While fully honoring and supporting those who choose to abstain from sex for spiritual reasons, for those who choose to include sexuality in their spiritual path, it is important to be open and real in discussing this powerful force and how it can be used to change our lives and world. The term sacred sexuality is now being heard with increasing frequency in certain circles. Please read the below eye-opening article showing how old attitudes are gradually changing. - Sacred Sex

Sacred sexuality is often associated with tantra – a spiritual practice in which sexuality is used to achieve higher spiritual states. Though tantric sexuality was developed in India thousands of years ago, it is recently becoming popular in certain pioneering groups in this modern age. The below article, while acknowledging those who choose a spiritual path of celibacy, describes some of the inspiring aspects of tantra or the art of spiritual lovemaking. - What is Spiritual Sex?

And for a couple short, inspiring essays on fostering spiritual intimacy in relationships, read these: - Intimate Relationships - On Intimacy

Remember that in matters of sacred sexuality, the energy or essence of the people involved is more important than the physical bodies they inhabit. The seven-minute video below beautifully demonstrates this:

Sacred Cows

Sacred Cows © Spyder Webb

Dear Human: You've got it all wrong. You didn't come here to master unconditional love. That is where you came from and where you'll return. You came here to learn personal love. Messy love. Sweaty love. Crazy love. Broken love. Whole love. Infused with divinity. Lived through the grace of stumbling. Demonstrated through the beauty of messing up. Often. You didn't come here to be perfect. You already are. You came here to be gorgeously human. Flawed and fabulous. And then to rise again into remembering. Love doesn't require the condition of perfection. It only asks that you show up. And do your best. That you stay present and feel fully. That you shine and fly and laugh and cry and hurt and heal and fall and get back up and play and work and live and die as YOU.
  ~  Courtney A. Walsh

Sacred Sexuality image

The quintessential masculine is a flow outward from center. It courageously journeys forth, exploring the power of individuation and separation. The quintessential feminine is a flow inward towards center. It lovingly embraces the magic of union with All That Is. The creative masculine has become dominant over the surrendering feminine in the past several thousand years. Yet there is now a call for a return to balance between masculine and feminine. Let us help welcome the beauty of the feminine back into loving, dynamic balance.

Though open discussion of sexuality is still taboo in many groups and communities, this potentially transformative power is gradually becoming a part of our meaningful literature and even seeping into the mainstream through the progressive media.

The below moving essay is a powerful example of the quality material now being published. The author reveals the painful, yet highly inspiring story of her sexual unfolding. Through the many trials and tribulations of her desperate search for love, she transforms from a young woman torn apart by her sexuality to eventually find that the ultimate love goes far beyond the ever-elusive knight in shining armor.

One of the purposes of this course is to really challenge you to be all that you can be. These lessons encourage us to explore the places where we are not yet in alignment personally with our commitment to the new paradigm. Money and sex are two forces which are known to most easily pull people out of their rational mind and off of their spiritual path. You are invited now to develop clear intentions around both money and sexuality in your life.

And when important decisions involving these key topics come up, don't forget to consider the life intentions that you've developed. In this way, when you find yourself losing your center around either money or sex, you can harmonize your choices and actions with your deeper desires in life. By sharing these intentions and any difficulties that arise with your trusted friends, you can also invite them to help you stay clearly and powerfully on the path that you have chosen.

Thanks for your willingness to explore these sensitive, yet highly important topics. To wrap up this lesson, you are invited to enjoy a little good humor on the topic of relationships. Please don't take either the two-minute video or the short essay below too seriously. Enjoy them for the rich parodies they are. And don't miss the excellent resources listed below, which can help you to develop a deeper level of integrity and clarity in your relationships and in your life in general.

There is a simple method to check your progress. Despite what appears to being going on in the world around you, how loving and harmonious are your personal relationships? How many arguments do you find yourself engaging in? The quality of your relationships is an excellent mirror from which to gauge the quality of that which you are creating. Remember the world is your mirror. It casts back at you the reflection of that which you have projected into it.   ~  From the Hidden Hand material

Sacred Sexuality angel

Take Action: Suggested Activities to Be the Change

  • In what ways have you been hurt or disempowered by others sexually in your life? In what ways have you hurt or disempowered others? Consider where in the past you have compromised your own integrity and beliefs around sexuality. Can you understand what happened? Can you forgive yourself and others for past transgressions? Consider how you might shift towards bringing sexuality and spirituality into closer alignment in your life.
  • How did your parents and your culture affect your sexual beliefs and understanding? Develop a greater awareness of how these and all of the subtle and not-so-subtle sexual messages conveyed through advertising and more in our world affect you. Consider the energy behind those messages and explore ways in which you might shift how that energy affects you.
  • Consider that the deepest desire in sexuality is for intimate connection. When you find yourself feeling sexually frustrated or dissatisfied, open to the desire for deep connection that is beneath this and explore ways to transform your sexual energy, so that it fully supports you in being an amazing force for positive change in this world.
  • Take some time to write the story of your sexual journey in this life. Once you complete that, think about whether or not you would be willing to share this with those close to you. Explore the possibility that by taking this vital aspect of yourself out of the shadows and into the light, you can bring more acceptance and love into your life.
  • Write down all of the experiences about which you might still feel some shame in your life. Open to the lessons from these difficult times and explore how you might transform your shame into wisdom. Consider even sharing these stories with trusted friends and seeking their support as a way of shifting towards love and empowerment.
  • If you have a spouse or sexual partner, check in and see how open he or she is to incorporating spirituality into your sexual connection. Explore ways you might embrace sacred sexuality that feel empowering to both you and your partner. Delve into some of the links in this lesson and the resources below for ideas.

For Those Who Want More

http://psychologytomorrow... - Graceful Guidelines for Sexual Healing

This engaging five-page summary provides some rich and thought-provoking exercises for healing our sexual shame and wounds. The author, Dr. Michael Picucci, has also written a highly praised book titled The Journey Toward Complete Recovery: Reclaiming Your Emotional, Spiritual & Sexual Wholeness. To read reviews and purchase this book, click here. - Hold Me Tight by Sue Johnson

The best practical guide for helping long-term couples deal with the challenges and patterns that arise in relationship once the initial enfatuation fades. The approach presented, Emotionally Focused Therapy, has been heralded by Time magazine and the New York Times as the couple therapy with the highest rate of success. Identify your own patterns and that of your partner when you get triggered and learn how to overcome them and transform your relationship in profound ways. - Human Awareness Institute (HAI)

HAI offers amazing, life-changing workshops around the world dealing with love, intimacy, and sexuality. For many people love and sexuality are separate, and sexuality is largely a taboo subject. HAI offers a forum to learn, share our fears, and discuss sexuality and intimate relationships. HAI workshops are carefully structured to provide a safe environment where the heart is the center of connection.

http://psychologytomorrow... - Sacred Sexuality and Sex

A fun, powerful description of sacred sexuality invites us to reframe the way we view passion and sexuality to include the spiritual and matters of the soul. - Society for Sacred Sexuality

The Society for Sacred Sexuality offers sacred sex lessons, professional services and training, plus news, advocacy, and resources for the general public and the global sacred sexuality community. Their mission is to promote learning, create a supportive environment for sacred sexuality gatherings, and usher in a global awakening based on sacred sexual wisdom and genuine enlightened experience. - Let's Talk Sex

An educational website challenging us to revisit the many taboos around talking about sexuality. By encouraging open dialogue about both the pain and the ecstasy that sex can bring, this thought-provoking website encourages us to shine a light into the dark corners of sex for the purpose of empowering both our sexuality and our lives in general.

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